Impressions: The Douchebag

⊆ 5:51 PM by A. Liebendorfer | , , , , , , . | ˜ 4 comments »

If the bluesy guitarist-turned-ladykiller John Mayer feels pressed to find a mark he's made on the world aside from his hit lament "Gravity," he need not look further than a simple Google search.  The inquiry "douchebag john mayer" generates an even 50,000 hits.  Many of us would never see this as a positive thing but --is blogging old enough to say this?-- Mayer's blog post about douchiness has set the proverbial blogging "world on fire."


It's a masterful blog, one to study.  First, Mayer calls to attention a common 21st-century archetype that's floating around, the Douchebag.  Being such a new term, I doubt there's a direct style on how to write it, but I'm sticking with the one-word nomenclature here.  Using the technically incorrect way to write it differentiates it from the now well-known piece of feminine hygiene.  (Truth Three: The Media brings everything from the fringes of society inward.)  He skillfully presents the definition of douchebag in its own inflaming, douchey form.

I hadn't realized how much the idea of writing about douches has taken off until I came across Joe Donatelli's blog.  Donatelli is an OU alum from the mid-90's whom I found while researching a story for a publication I'm involved in.  In his post, he offers more insight on the Douche (an abbreviated but just as stinging for of douchebag) as Mayer's blog emerged when douchedom was relatively a new thing.

We ask, Where has the Douchebag come from?  From what hole in the ground has he sprung?

Different theories arise.  The one I subscribe to is that douchebags have evolved from the "village idiot" stereotype of old.  At the core, the two groups are essentially the same and treated similarly.

The self-esteem phenomenon is what has kept the village idiot alive all this time.  In fact, it's brought him to the town center.  What infuses the village idiot and makes him a pure douchebag is his or her sense of numb-nutted confidence.  The douchebag thrusts himself or herself into the center of attention and is routinely not able to deliver.  They live, bask, bathe in shock value.

Watch out, douchebags aren't just the douches you graduated with.  You'll find them: in bars, chilling as hillbillies, at dances, even as girls!

Expect a follow-up on this.  We're not done with the douches.




Sex-volution: Uprising in Chile

⊆ 1:27 AM by A. Liebendorfer | , , . | ˜ 1 comments »

In Tangle of Young Lips, a Sex Rebellion in Chile

-Alexei Barrionuevo
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/13/world/americas/13chile.html

Chile's Sexual Awakening
-photos by Tomas Munita
http://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2008/09/09/world/20080913CHILE_index.html?ref=americas

____________________________________________________________________

For me, this article echoes memories of Craig.  "Craig" was the name we had given to the Chilean exchange student our senior year, for what reason, I'm not sure.  He just looked like a Craig, though I argued Kenneth.

Before Craig's suave, misogynist aura offended his first host family the last time, the predominately-female household ate him up.  He was everything a small-town Ohio girl would want from a South American exchange student: ever-bronze skin, good eyes, kind of tall, aloof most of the time.  Him and I had grown close and he confided that his father back home owned a perfume store so he always smelled as some put it "scrumptious."

For an exchange student, Craig was a young gun.  If I remember, we took him out for wings for his birthday, and I'm pretty sure he turned 17 then.

His age wasn't flushed out until he started talking to my alumnus friend Mara.  At the time Mara was 19 and took Craig to be like the rest of the exchange students and out of high school already.

Craig thought he was really bad:

She walked away.  "I've got her in ...  hmm ... how is said ... ah, bolsillo?"

"Pocket, Craig?" I asked.

"Yeeah.  I've got her in my pahkett," and he punctuated with a smirk.

"You like how that sounds, huh?"

"Yeeah," he belched.

He went with her after whatever function it was we were at and I let him go.  In the week that followed, I had to cover for Craig because his family had a grudge with Mara and wouldn't let their supposed young love blossom.

Then by the next weekend Mara had some words for me.  Craig was starting to creep her out and "court" her.  Yes, she used "court."  He would kiss her hand and try numb-nuttedly to smooch her.  She wasn't very happy about not mentioning how young he was.

Reading this article and looking at those pictures, I can't help but wonder where Craig is and what kind of obscene shock he's gone through.  It wouldn't take much to get ahold him --just a few clicks and a Facebook message-- but I can't help but wonder what he would say if I said I wanted to visit sometime. 

I can see the response now, just like the one my Bolivian friend's already given me, "You need to get your butt down here.  I can get you all the girls and ... you can't believe it, man!"


Impressions: Right Thing to Wear at the Wrong End of the Gun

⊆ 6:59 PM by A. Liebendorfer | , , , , . | ˜ 0 comments »

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/06/world/americas/06mexico.html?_r=1&oref=slogin


Call Colombian Miguel Caballero (miguelcaballero.com) an entrepreneur.  His trendy fashion line appeals to most upper class people around the world.  Sorry ladies, he mostly focuses on men's clothing, but there are some for you in his American Gold Collection and everything is custom-tailored.  And his website is just supremely cool: It's flash-based with quick access to all of his clothing lines and a ribbon of smoke snaking across the background that evokes fantasies of Amsterdam discotheques.

The clothes on his website look promising --at least enough so look at the features and start rooting for prices.  Right down the list: Tailor-made, Thermo-regulating, Flexible, Thin, Lightweight.  Still no price.  It must be so expensive you have to inquire.  The last thing is on the far right of the screen, a table of handguns in ascending "protection levels."

Call Miguel Caballero an entrepreneur; he is the world's leading designer in bulletproof styles.

The clothing, which boasts a trendy European line and a cheesy, rough 'n tumbler American line, is crafted to protect its wearer from most small-arms fire at point-blank.  In spite of what you would think, the clothes look extremely comfortable.  

Don't believe it?


Courtesy of YouTube user VBSdotTV

Don't expect to go out and buy one any time soon.  Price tags for Miguel Caballero clothing can range up to $7,000.  The likely customers?  Presidents, ambassadors, celebrities.  According the New York Times, Venezuelan president Hugo Chávez and Colombian president Álvaro Uribe have already bought.


Fall Quarter '08: Midnight

⊆ 12:39 AM by A. Liebendorfer | , , , , . | ˜ 0 comments »

There are interesting phenomena among college freshmen.  The first is how easy they are to spot the first week: traveling in herds, visible lanyards, copious college apparel.  The second is how they disappear in the second week.  Suddenly the most straight-laced of freshmen emerge with body piercing and some start tattoo tableaus on their backs.


I got out of my shift at The Post tonight at midnight.  I can't put my finger on it but there's something whimsical about midnight walks home.  Only the Asians walk the streets that late at night, skirting back from their midnight classes.  It's an inherently reflective time of day.

I couldn't help but ponder all this self-reinvention going on, and I couldn't help but feeling I'm squandering this opportunity.  It's amazing how I'm with the same friends in different skins.  I still eat more than I should, not exercise enough, not read enough.

I opened the door to my musty room.  "This is the base of operations" was what came to my mind.

Now the question.  What am I going to change?


Fall Quarter '08: Voseo

⊆ 10:28 PM by A. Liebendorfer | , , , , , , . | ˜ 3 comments »

I'm trying to think of a euphemism.  I had a lofty opinion of myself in high school Spanish class, especially the last year.  So much that I wasn't surprised in the least to learn I tested into Spanish 341.  I was kind of cocky about it, really.  I still am.


But every Tuesday and Friday, Professor Porter tears me a new one in Gordy Hall.  I consulted my old friend and Spanish teacher this summer, and she said to expect what I now call The Rapture.  But thus my latent fuego for Spanish has been rekindled.

The voseo was a ghost in my Spanish studies.  To make it brief, many European languages deal with their verbs by sticking on suffixes on roots to show who's doing what and when they're doing it.  This goes without saying that it's much --MUCH-- more complicated.  Well, Spanish has a dialect in Latin America that uses another word instead of the normal "tú" for you, and that is "vos."  What's so weird about it is that how it's used changes from country to country but it still has its own rules.  I spent a week searching for the rules to get a straight answer and still nothing.

Then one day last week, I was sitting at the end of a test.  I was exhausted and irritated.  I had studied until wee hours for that test and I knew the best I could hope for would be a low A.  I did what I always do and started flipping through pages.  Then, de repente, there it was.  A full two pages on el voseo right there in the text book.

A NOTE FOR ANY INTERESTED: The conjugation of the pronoun "vos" varies from country to country, but mostly it is conjugated like Spain's "vosotros" just without the "i."  This is different in Chile and Venezuela mostly.  In Chile, -ar verbs take of the "s" on the end of the vosotros form and -er and -ir verbs only have "ís."  Venezuelan Spanish is faux-Castillian.  Vosotros isn't used but vos is conjugated like it.  All other tenses are conjugated the same way (but subjunctive uses the opposite vos) and direct and indirect object pronouns are "te."

So while the professor was up there, turning my head upside down about preterit and imperfect, I kept day dreaming about saying "vos."  Ok, that's a little extreme, but really, Spanish is bottomless.  And my basic understanding of past tenses in Spanish just got thrown into the creek.

So, what's next week?

Who will ever read this and get as much of a kick I would if I had read this, I don't know.


Election '08: '08, Oh God...

⊆ 9:14 AM by A. Liebendorfer | , , , , , , , . | ˜ 3 comments »

I'm partisan!


"Can I call you Joe?" Washington Hall echoed with derision.  I took this as maybe the only chance I'll have in the next hour and a half to refill my water bottle.  Walking down the hall, every room had the debates on and it seemed like Palin's thick, gerund-decapitating accent seemed to seep through the walls.  People had been practicing their impersonations of her all week; by last night they were getting good.

I heard our next cue: "I thing a good barometer here is we try to figure is this a good time or a bad in our economy is go to your kid's soccer game..."

Watching her --not a hard thing to do-- she was bleeding youth.  She fidgeted a little behind her podium, stumbled on her words.  Don't get me wrong.  Biden had his hiccups, namely struggling through pronouncing I think it was "characterized" and dancing around the Alaskan governor a little too much.  I love Sarah Palin.  She's got the image of who should be president.  It's just... she doesn't even know the NATO commander for Afghanistan.  

"Governor Palin," we hoped the moderator would've said, "is there any way you could be more vague?"  I heard talks of drinking games going on where people would chug or what have you when either of the candidates said their lame signature lines.  There were a lot of sirens last night.  I figured them to be Team Palin suffering from alcohol poisoning.

With all the pundits declaring Palin won by not losing, I can't help but disagree.  I'm with everybody else in the middle class that's completely enamored with Sarah, but she just needs time.  She shifted up too many gears too quickly.  Not to mention, you win by winning.

I think it was McLellan-McKiernan mix-up that ruined my view in balanced commentary.  I realized that I really have specific things I want out this election.  Looking at work abroad, the chair of the senate foreign relations committee just appeals to me.  And that's that.

So with a heavy heart, I end this commentary series.  Punditry has no place anywhere, especially on my blog.

Good thing veep debates barely matter.


The Monthly Washingtonian, Vol. I

⊆ 1:27 AM by A. Liebendorfer | ˜ 0 comments »

Hopefully this will be the first in many photo essays depicting life in and around Washington Hall.  First is a picture of when a fire alarm tripped across the street at Read.  The rest are of mattress jousting.  Don't ask for names.  I promise the photojournalism will improve for later editions.

__________________________

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Fall Quarter '08: Extemporaneity

⊆ 6:03 PM by A. Liebendorfer | ˜ 2 comments »

The litany of every walk to anywhere on campus:
"Excuse me.  Are you registered to vote in Athens?"

I really hate public speaking, but Public Speaking is starting to grow on me.

Tammy our professor makes it a point to call the depressing state of the country to our attention every class period.  There are one or two of us that I spy texting or having that glazed over look, but every time she makes her case the room gets a little grave.

Yesterday we watched famous speeches and she wanted us to take note of things.  These are my favorite classes periods, ones where you can sit back, marvel and analyze.

The first was Peter Peterson addressing the House of Representatives about the economy.  Who Peter Peterson is and why they named him twice, I have no idea, but I do know that he started the Peter G. Peterson Foundation and has floated above the rest of the economic know-it-all's and is as articulate as he is passionate about everything America.  

His somber numbers and figures were (something I'm determined to make a cliche) like out of a movie.  The people behind him moved little and moved concertedly.  This set the stage for the RFK speech.

I had never seen RFK's announcement of Martin Luther King's assassination; it put me in awe. I'll leave you to the YouTube video.  Everything in the speech from the Aeschylus quote to quipping that both JFK and MLK were killed by white men were incredible to me.  And all of it impromptu.

It makes you wonder where old-school orators have gone.  My first thought was that pundits kill our chances to witness these great moments in history.  But listening to him, it's really flawless.  I don't think even punditry could dissect this on-the-spot address, a hallmark to the public virtuoso of the Kennedy's.  

I've witnessed dozens of responses to the Athens voting question.  Some people have cut them off, asking if they have registered to vote in Athens; most or cordial to the last; I have a little wave that I've got down.

But now, it's hard not to want a share in this helter-skelter world we're inheriting.



Election '08: The Man's an Idiot pt. 2 pt. 2

⊆ 10:19 AM by A. Liebendorfer | , , , , , , , . | ˜ 1 comments »

Anyway, Obama's an idiot.


Barring all Goonies-era verbiage, an Obama-Clinton ticket would've been a real double whammy.

The family image in a dual-gender ticket makes its case on Democrat side too.  Let's beat the dead horse for a minute here and restate that times are tough.  Nobody wants to be lead by parents who are at odds with each other.

Though nothing says family values like this:


courtesy YouTube user: VoteMcCainPalin

Near the end of my senior year we were driving to Law Day of all things and we got stuck behind a car going to our county seat.  On the back so eloquently was written, "Clinton '08: Vote for the B****."

That's how people like Hilary Clinton.  If you talk to a Clinton supporter, not one of them will give an epithet describing how approachable she is.  It's her --forgive me-- ideas that drew people to her.  Though some argue that she's the Antichrist, Hilary's all business, and when businesses start failing, all business sounds handy.

Don't get me wrong, after Edwards said he'd decline being on the ticket, Joey the Shark is second-best.  Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee is a strong choice for Obama's assertive platform abroad.

And who can't love a guy that does this?


courtesy of YouTube user: rthuffma

But come on Barack, sign on the b****.

Biden's doing minimal work in filling the gaps in Obama's ticket.  Go to their campaign website.  The outline of the foreign policy plan is shoddy at best and gives next to no details on McCain's stand and sparse ones of his own.  If there were a prequel to 1984, Big Brother's campaign website would probably have more specifics than Obama.com.

Word on the street is that Biden might be stepping down from the spot early this month.  If that's the case, Hil better get back into the picture.  That doesn't mean she has to be president.  Actually, the best way to make sure she isn't president to take her in as veep.  You don't see many vice-presidents throwing out their old running mates.

Besides, if we just had that Dream Ticket, we wouldn't be all worried about a close race...


Election '08: The Man's an Idiot pt. 2 pt.1

⊆ 10:03 AM by A. Liebendorfer | , , , , , , . | ˜ 1 comments »

Headaches were abound yesterday at my Religion, Gender, and Sexuality class.  The class is structured around about an hour of review of the reading or expounding beyond the reading followed by a forty-five minute group discussion session.


We finally crossed the no-no border yesterday.  In a class that's aimed at making you comfortable talking about your beliefs, yesterday was the first time we touched on politics.  I elected to take the current presidential race (and what about the congressional one?) philosophically, which proved much more interesting.

Though Sarah's paling in the media, she symbolizes something intriguing on a deeper level.  All this time it was the stereotype that the Democrats would be the first a woman in the Oval Office.  They put the first Catholic there, the first paralytic, and the first man the moon.  Hilary seemed like a shoe-in, but no, we decided to put the first black man this time instead.

Maybe for another blog, McCain's veep pick makes a lot of sense when looking at Republican values.  I've never once heard a liberal stand in front of a crowd and preach about the importance of close families, which is probably Palin's strong point.

The philosophical conclusion I came to while the rest of my group were butting heads and misconstruing each others words yesterday was that McCain is going to be America's dad, and Palin America's hockey mom.  The dual-gender ticket was aimed at making America feeling they were in good hands, Republican style.  McCain didn't only pick Palin to get the woman vote, but also for the imagery and symbolism.  Mom and Dad are going to put a band-aid on the country.

Nothing says American mom more than a mother of five with serviceman for a son, one pregnant daughter, two other daughters, and a son with Down syndrome.  They really are a type of core sample of what the American family is up against these days.

Did it work?  An young, under-qualified governor from one of the country's most corrupt states wasn't the best move.  But wow --I'm not leaning any which way this election--, as a conservative symbol, pure genius.


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